Let’s Get Run Drunk!

I love getting run-drunk. Also known as run-dumb.

Run-drunk is what happens when you’ve been running for so long and/or are so tired that you can’t do simple math. It’s that point where you run 3 or 4 miles without realizing it because you are trying to figure out simple pace calculations in your head.

Good times.

Here’s an example from just the other night. I left the house carrying a bicycle bottle full of water and dropped it off about a half mile from the house at a spot I’d planned to loop through a couple of times. When I threw it over into the grass I actually took note of how heavy it had been to carry and felt instant relief letting it go.

During the course of my run I decided to go a different route with a bigger loop that has water spots built in. No problem–I’d just pick up the bottle on the way back to the house. I was already pretty tired from my bike ride the night before; so tired that I got a little run-buzzed and missed a couple of turns in my newly planned route. Basically I was wandering around the neighborhood like an idiot. People probably would have been alarmed if it weren’t for the fact that I’m so slow. If I was up to no good, they’d have no trouble running me down.

Nine miles later,  I found my bearings and headed back home. I stopped to pick up my water bottle and thought I’d have one last little pit stop before the final .5 home. I probably drank 1/3 of the water from the bottle and was on my way.

Now, how far do you think I went before I realized I was carrying around a bottle full of water (weight) that I was going to take into the house and empty into the sink? I’m actually proud of myself for figuring it out before I got home, but embarrassed that I didn’t think of pouring it all out immediately.

I recommend getting run-drunk to everyone. Also, know that unlike drunk-drunk, it’s ok to get run-drunk alone.

But know going into it that run-drunk isn’t as fun as drunk-drunk. It just doesn’t hurt as badly the next day.

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