Here’s the transcription of a voicemail I received from the YMCA today inviting me to join up:

Hi, this is all of that a volunteer at the center align today. This is a courtesy call to let you back to alive. If you’re enjoying by 7:30 1st still a vagina see if you have any questions, just call ###-####. Thank you.

If this had been an accurate transcription, I may have actually returned the call!